The Worst Dressed Man In The Whole World! (possibly Universe.)
So I live in a not so great area of Louisville, Kentucky at the moment. It's completely by choice so we can save up money to buy a house but because of this I get to see a ton of people and things you don't really get to see in areas of a city that have more money and basically higher standards in general. For instance when we first moved down here a couple months ago I decided to go for a walk. I was taken aback by all the trash on the side of the roads and in yards and such. While walking someone just set down a big Styrofoam cup from a local gas station. They did this just right in front of my face and didn't think a thing of it. I was so surprised. Why would you trash the place you lived? For the first month every day on my street I went up and down the street about five houses each way from me cleaning up trash. You wouldn't belive how much trash had accumulated in the very same spots just the next morning. Not to mention when someone moves out all of their nasty things that they didn't want get thrown on the side of the road anywhere. After it's sat there for a while in the weather it starts looking pretty terrible. It kinda makes you wonder how these people actually live and what the inside of their private homes look like where no one can see and judge them. You can see roaches just walk across any road here. It's truly disgusting. I'm really just dumbfounded that no one wants their home and their area of town to be better or at least cleaner for themselves and their children.
So since this is the type of person that's commonly found down here you can imagine the extreme fashion faux pas that I see on a daily basis. I don't go out very much unless I need something or I'm leaving this area of town but I still see something crazy daily in the crazy fashion area.
Now let me clarify, I'm no fashionista whatsoever. I spend my lazy days in yoga pants and one of many of my work out tops from JustFabs athletic line Fabletics. I even leave the house like that down here if I'm just running a quick errand. I always make sure I'm clean, showered, my hair looks decent and that my ugly face is covered up with some sort of make up lol but some of these fashion blunders are so outrageously wrong that I just have to take a picture and blog about it here like the picture above.
The most common fashion for men down in this area is extremely skinny men wearing no shirt and baggy jeans with their underwear and asses hanging out. I have talked to these men in the past when I used to hang out down here during my not so great past and they would make fun of any man who did this that didn't have an inverted stomach like they hadn't eaten in three weeks. Like seriously, this is the body they strive for. Not the healthy, athletic (not body builder.) Body, but instead the poor starving heroin chic look. I thought heroin chic was only hot on women in the 90s. I didn't think men ever tried that. I'm just happy I haven't seen much of the "Portland Fade." That was truly horrid. I'm hoping it's been phased out but honestly like I said I don't associate with much of anyone down here or anywhere really so I can't really say whether it's around still or not, I just personally haven't seen it. The Portland Fade is where the men buzz their heads as short as they possibly can and leave the very first layer of hair at their bangs just in the front middle. Than they cut those bangs to about an inch and a half long and either leave them dry and flat or make the whole thing even worse by gelling them flat to their forehead. I'm sure you can imagine how truly ugly that is. Who in their right mind would think this looked good? Seriously?! And for it to become a fad for the long amount of time that it was is literally insane. Like those people had to be psychotic. Seriously.
This is it except the bangs are flat on the forehead. Almost plastered straight right onto the skin.
This pic above is similar to the thin bangs but they are flatter and straighter across with only a thin line of longer hair. The rest is buzzed even on top. I literally couldn't find one pic of it anywhere no matter how many different search terms I used. That's how ridiculous it is. It doesn't even exist anywhere else. Lol
Even this would be a good trade off from the "Portland Fade." Haha.
Now onto the guy in the picture. I was at the gas station with my mother. She had come down to visit and was heading home yesterday so she needed to head to the gas station to pick up some food and drinks for her trip home since travel food at airports, train stations, bus stations, etc. Is always insane. The gas station was extremely busy for some reason and so it took a while for her to get through the line and I sat in the car just waiting. I look forward and this man catches my eye. What I see first is that his pants are literally half way down his thighs. They look like they are about to fall off. I can't for the life of me figure out how they are staying up at all and how he keeps them up when he decides to move at all, especially when walking. The science and logic of it just doesn't add up. There is some ugly belt, so maybe it's so tight it's cutting his circulation off and keeping the pants up. Maybe it will cut the blood supply off to somewhere close and we don't have to worry about this loser procreating. I'm not saying that to be harsh because of what he's wearing. That would be a little judgemental. I'm not judgemental, I'm mostly just making an observational joke. I could care less what this dude or anyone else wears, I just think it's funny. Unfortunately though he was doing something I see quite a bit happen out in the open down here. The man's car he was standing near was searching through his car for a good few min, found what he was looking for and set it inside some trash and handed the weird looking dude the trash as the weird looking dude handed him money. You can pretty much see in the sequence of the pictures a drug deal was happening. Whatever. To each their own. I think it should be decriminalized anyway, but that doesn't mean a drug addict should be having children during active addiction and so that's why I made the comment above.
Anyway, he was wearing these cheap looking black boxer briefs. If I was going to show them to the world I would at least be springing for some Calvin Kleins, not be showing off my ugly as hell Joe Boxer like underwear. Because his pants were so low you should have been able to see the outline of his dick. Maybe you could if you were really close up idk. I'm not trying to be vulgar here but when my Fiance and I are home alone and he's in his boxer briefs I can see his dangly thingy clear as day. There's no hiding it even when fully not aroused. This man must have been tiny down there and that should be his business and whatever girl would mess with him, and I admit I was wondering who would sleep with this dude, but he made it obvious to the entire world he wasn't even average "down there." Then he's wearing a button up flannel shirt. It was truly ugly. It would have been ugly had it been worn as it should have been but this man in his mid 30s had a special ability to make all his clothing look much worse than they ever should have been able to. It was just unbuttoned and too big. Not cute. Then those sunglasses. Obviously womens sunglasses from 2005. Ya know those white bug eyed sunglasses we all wore. I know it's embarassing to admit, but you know you did! ;) has he had those ugly things for over a decade? Seriously? Please do the world a favor and burn these babies dude!
Last but certainly not least is his 90s style bandana. It's tied as tightly as possible to the head with a tiny stretched out weird bow in the back. When was this ever sexy and please god tell me why?! I know it used to be the badass guys in the 90s who wore these types of bandanas, bikers and the like. I was just a child then though so I never thought that look was sexy and I know now it's really just ugly. This man fits a lot of the trends from my "90s trends we hated to love." Blog that I posted here not too long ago.
Please sir, do the world a favor and grow up. At least in your fashion sense. My eyes were so offended and my brain was in a tizzy after I watched you get into a car with some woman. She wasn't particularly hot buy I can't believe this woman would but you drugs and than sleep with you. It's obvious that was the situation because she was driving you in her decent car and you've obviously never held a job and why would she do any of that for you unless you were doing her. I will never understand why she would want to.
Stay tuned for more fashion blunders as I come across them.
Here's some random common fashion crimes you should make sure you don't commit again!
My Sephora shipment came in two days ago so I will be reviewing, showing looks and tutorials on Diorshow Mascara, Anastasia Beverly Hills new Glow Kit in the newly released Sun Dipped colors, the Anastasia Beverly Hills Liquid Lipstick (swatches will be in the color crush.), Kat Von D Lock It Powder foundation, and last but not least the Makeup Forever Hd Liquid Foundation. All will be finished by Monday hopefully plus my Urban Decay Spectrum Palette review and Tutorials that are long past due.
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